Donald E. Anderson broadcasting on CB channel 38, LSB (September 2011).

"I had dinner with my daugher, she's a medical doctor, she, uh, I gotta be honest... I had a smoked ham, swiss cheese, tomato basil soup... spicy mustard... it was alright... I am a loser, ok, I am a loser and I know that... an underachiever, a loser, a person who has had a very sordid life, a life of crime, violence, drugs, baby-killing, war-mongering, drug abuse, violence, prison... and my children.. they are 180 degrees different than what I am ... they're opposites of what I am... It's a situation that's a facade, it's not real, not in the realm of reality when I'm around these children of mine....we're not in some kind of a relationship that really means a lot... I'm happy with that because I see so many people who lve their lives vicariously through their children... I'm not a person who's not aware of my children... but I don't wanna live my life for someone else... 

I want it to be about me....How many girls did I poke this year? Were any of them really attractive? How many nekkid girls did I see or how many books did I read or how many miles did I put on my bicycle or is my pecker still gettin' real hard, you know?

My daughter's telling me about people who're dying.... I guess I'm doing my part... giving a response to humanity I suppose... 

Having wonderful sex... don't ever underestimate the value of that. Don't ever think that a good sexual encounter is not something you can appreciate... it makes life interesting and exciting. Always have that sexual access in your life, that's very important... it was Pablo Picasso who taught me that at a very early age... sexual fulfillment is very good for a person... 

And then, challenges on an intellectual level, for instance I'm reading a book now by a very famous French philosopher called The Rebel... it's somewhat over my head I might add too... but I am enjoying it...called The Rebel, by Camus Arnold, I think?  [Donny means Albert Camus, pronounced Albear Camoo, a French Communist whose views contributed to the philosophy known as Absurdism].

Anyway, sometimes you have to be selfish with your pursuit of happiness... You may want to consider being somewhat selfish... The rewards of a selfish pursuit of happiness... Don't underestimate that.... that's what I have for you. 

I'm on the airwaves giving free advice. If you went to a psychiatrist, they'd charge you 3 or 4 hundred dollars an hour and if you went to a psychologist, they'd charge you 200 hundred dollars an hour and if you went to a psychotherapist they'd probably charge you 100 dollars an hour. Just think about how lucky you are to have me give you this wonderful advice. You're very, very fortunate. 

The thrust of the advice is this... Selfishness is the pursuit of your own blissful existence. Be a little bit selfish, take care of yourself, and when you're thinking about that selfishness, don't leave out a very important part of your life, remember that sex is very important for your mental health... You can be a selfish lover sometimes too.. tell 'em what you want and if they can't give you what you want, find somebody that can... have fun with it. You know, you're so very lucky to have the Funky Monkey giving you advice... like I said, this advice could cost you about 400 dollars an hour.... 

Anyway I was happy to help you. The Funky Monkey, do any of you have any questions or comments? They call me the Funky Monkey..... I was like 5, 10 years old and my father was instrumental in getting the information in getting a CB license... so I was probably one of the very first people to be licensed as a CB operator..."